Dear Mom

May 15, 2017

Dear Mom,

I was reading an article the other day by Rob Lowe about sending his son off to college. After I bawled my eyes out, I decided to write this letter to you. I wasn’t crying because I was imagining dropping my own kids off at college one day, although now I know that I will be entirely unfit for that experience, I was crying because it had so many similarities to when you and dad first dropped me off at Tennessee. In that moment reading his piece, I think for the first time, I fully reflected on what that experience must’ve been like for you and dad.

To be honest, some days it still feels like yesterday. I’ll never forget. We packed up the car and with tears in my eyes, I waved goodbye to Alex and our house as we pulled out of the driveway, setting forth on an 800 mile journey to what would be my new home sweet home, Rocky Top Tennessee.

Although sad to leave home and my friends, I was excited for the new adventure that lied ahead; a roommate, new friends, an opportunity with the basketball team and all of the unknown that is going away to college.

Upon arriving to Tennessee, we spent a couple of days meeting and greeting and getting things prepared before move in day approached. Move in day, how could we forget that gem? It was hot as if the devil himself was walking the earth and I was blessed to be assigned to the dorm building with no AC. You and dad worked your butts off, sweating away and toting all of my things up the stairs to the second floor. Meanwhile, you were on a mission to get me settled in like only a mother could. Hot, hungry and exhausted, we got the job done.

With you guys heading out in the morning and me staying in my new dorm that night, it came time to part ways. Excited that one of the older basketball girls was already there, ready to show me around town, I stood strong. We said our goodbyes, gave each other our hugs and held back most of the tears. (Secretly, I planned to call you guys in the morning before you left to come say bye one more time, but I broke my phone that night.)

Then came the final moment that is forever etched in my memory. Just as I was walking out of the dorm, you and dad were driving by and there you were in the front seat, sobbing. You unrolled your window and through your cries mumbled, “Bye Jussy, we love you.”

I can’t remember if I held it together then, but I know in my homesick moments, that memory always opened the flood gates the quickest. At the time though, I still didn’t fully understand the depth of your tears. Sure, I had left home, but home wasn’t going anywhere, I’d be home for Christmas, home for summer and so on.

But you, as my mom, knew differently. You knew your little girl had left home for good, she was out to see the world. Sure she’d be back to visit, but that wasn’t home anymore. She was becoming an adult, on her own, and would be mostly taking care of herself now.

Well mom, I’m writing this to tell you that’s not true. Home is not so much a place, as it is a comfort and it’s a comfort that I can only ever get from you, my mom. Home is that phone call or FaceTime anytime I'm sick, upset, worried or confused, that even from one million miles away, never fails to make me feel better. Home is that escape that's only a flight away where I know I can be fed, catered to and cared for like no other human can possibly provide. And to this day, there’s no place quite like home.

So mom, I just want to say thanks for dropping me off at college that day. Thank you for unselfishly supporting my dreams and encouraging me to get out and experience the world. Thank you for always being my biggest fan and my biggest supporter. And most importantly, thanks for always keeping home, home.

You have no idea what I feel like I owe to you, but just know even though I won’t be moving back “home” anytime soon, your baby girl will always be your baby girl and I need you now as much as I ever have.

I love you!

Jussy

Mission I'mPoSSIBLE

August 5, 2016

From the jump, two common themes that I knew would play a foundational part of Justineslife were community and collaboration. Why? Because not only do I personally rely on these two things on a daily basis, but I truly believe that it is with the positive encouragement, support and accountability from our circles and our communities that we become the best I.

It is these checks and balances that keep us positive, humble, and strong enough to push forward through our greatest obstacles to our greatest accomplishments.

This brings me to this week's edition of #ReflectionsofGratitude. Thanks to two of my awesome sisters from other misters, Sammy and Val, I stepped out of my comfort zone this past weekend and joined the MIP Worldwide community at Jason Markk for a nice little Saturday run, (that eventually progressed into a full two days of fellowship.)

Don't get me wrong, hanging with a bunch of dope new people for an entire weekend, right up my alley; the whole running long distance part, not so much. But on I went to support my friends...

Look, if we're talking sprints, I'm there. I'm an athlete. I can go all day. Who wants it? Allyson Felix, where you at!? Distance though? Eh, I'm cool. Always unsure of whether I'll be able to finish the run at a respectable pace, and also (being instinctively extremely competitive) in first place, I've typically shy'd away from group distance running.

But Saturday there I was, at 1 o'clock, in the heat of the summer day, my excuses locked and loaded, about to take off running across DTLA with a large group of people. Off first glance, the group clearly consisted of a few pro runners, who surely were supposed to have left for Rio already, the fitness buffs, who do this everyday like it's drinking water, the middle of the packers (like myself), who were going to get by, a few people I could definitely beat, and my buddy Javier, who after randomly crossing paths with us, was going to join in despite sporting blue jeans and carrying a book.

BOOM! We're off. Energy is high, everyone's having fun, I'm feeling good, and amazingly, no one has sprinted to the front of the pack like Superman. Just as it feels the pace is about to settle in, enter "praise break" number one. You know, the part of the race where everyone from the runners' pace to the party pace pauses together and allows the whole group to catch up while holding squats, cheering loudly and creating bridges for each other to run under.

It was during that first praise break, of what would go on to be many, that I realized this was no race at all. This wasn't a competition. No one was supposed to win, or feel self-conscious or leave discouraged, never wanting to come again. This was a collaboration, a journey, together, designed to grow ourselves by first bettering one another. There were no egos, no levels, and no talk about who you are or what you do (which in LA we all know can be hard to come by.) We were all on the same playing field.

We laughed, we ran, we accomplished heights we were unsure we could achieve and we left no one behind. As it turns out, I didn't need all of those excuses I had packed after all. I was fully capable of completing the run, and even if at times I needed to walk, there was always going to be someone back in the party pace willing to walk with me, passing no judgement, keeping me encouraged and making sure we finished the mission.

That is what it's all about. Relying on we to create a better I, because together, there is no mission impossible, it's mission I'mPOSSIBLE. And for that, I am grateful.

For those of you unfamiliar with MIP Worldwide, it stands for Mission I'mPOSSIBLE. MIP is not just a run club, but a community built on outreach, leadership and collaboration. MIP was founded in Vegas in 2012 by Sammy Jo herself. MIP's Core Value II states that, "the RUNway is where dreams become a reality, ideas turn into action, life turns into living and tests turn into testimonies." Four years later, MIP is now an active 501c3 with ten chapters nationally. Through the help, belief and support of her community, Sammy was able to turn dreams into a reality and ideas into action.

To learn more about MIP or how to get involved in a chapter near you, check out their website.

From Robbins, Illinois...DWYANE WADE!

July 27, 2016

Two posts in one day?! Woah, let’s not get carried away Justine. I decided to jump right into things with #ReflectionsofGratitude because it was actually this memory that inspired the idea.

Monday, thanks to Facebook memories, I was reminded that FIVE years ago I interviewed Dwyane Wade and number of others at a fundraising celebrity kickball tournament hosted by Baron Davis. While I hadn’t forgotten this memory, I could not believe it was five years ago.

Five years ago, when I was a bright-eyed, bushy tailed, 23-year-old and a relative rookie to LA. I was hustling my way through the sports journalism field, interning here, working there, and just trying to get experience wherever I could. I was young and inexperienced in a HUGE market and my own biggest critic. Often feeling like I was a hamster on a wheel, I was never sure if I’d ever be as good as [insert person x, y, and z] to be able to compete. Every time I posted a video or interview, I was terrified.

Suddenly, five years ago seems about right. That kid was young and green. If I could go back and tell young Justine some things, I’d say, Justine, at 23, you’re navigating your way in a big city. You’re getting amazing opportunities. You’re interviewing Dwyane Wade, the guy who hung on a poster in your dorm room freshman year! You’re sitting down with athletes who people dream of interviewing. And you’re only getting better. As it turns out, that reel of yours isn’t so awful after all.

I’d say, enjoy the process. You’re doing it. You’re not so bad. I’m actually proud of you!

My, how life has changed and evolved since then. With no regrets and to my own content, about a year after this moment, I transitioned away from the journalism field to the digital side. (Although, I think I feel an itch coming back.) I continued to push forward and grow and navigate my way through this very competitive city. Five years later, I reluctantly admit that I’m an LA vet now. This city is my city. The world is at my fingertips and these experiences only equipped me for greater ones! And for that, I am grateful! I'm grateful for where the journey has taken me.

So a reminder to myself and anyone else, the journey is DOPE. The process IS the fun part. Thanks life, let’s keeping moving on up, but maybe not to the east side...I think I like the west side.

*If you have WAY too much time on your hands, feel free to watch the rest of the interviews from the event below, but remember, this is a judgement free zone. Haha

**Also, if you've never seen the Dwyane Wade commercial that inspired this post title, do yourself a favor and watch it here. It's one of the greatest basketball commercials ever made.

PREACH.

May 23, 2016

This was the first thing I saw on the 'gram when I woke up this morning. I was blown away. There couldn't have been a more perfect message staring me in the face with the launch of my site happening today. A small sign like this can be just the confirmation we need sometimes.

Thank you @inkyjohnson for sharing the inspo, I had to borrow it. (Inky is AMAZING by the way, if you are unfamiliar. Go check him out.)

It's about d*mn time.

May 23, 2016

There’s a difference between taking your sweet time and severely allowing fear and uncertainty engulf your goals and visions. Being completely candid, this project took WAY too long to get off the ground and I can fully credit the latter.

Insecurity, purpose, focus, self-doubt, the opinion of others…you name it, I let it stop me. And you know what’s funny about all of that? NONE of these things are tangible. In actuality, most are non-existent lies that we feed to ourselves. Crazy right?

The motto set for this year was reckless; reckless meaning without caution to fear, vulnerability, rejection, uncertainty, failure. It only took me five months into 2016, but here I am, finally taking my own advice, encompassing that motto. It’s time to get sh*t done.

The reality is, the reservations were inevitable. I deal with fear and vulnerability as much as the next person. Newsflash: WE ALL DO. But the other reality is, we have a choice -- to succumb to these inhibitions, or to silence them. For me, silencing them meant identifying the barriers, asking myself the why questions and unapologetically accepting my own answers.

Barrier number one: what’s the purpose and why? I’m at a point in my life where purposeless missions seem futile, so this question was important and necessary. It took me a long time to answer even though all along, I think I knew the answer, but continually let insecurity stop me at the door.

I was dealing with “they.” What will they think? Will they even care? What if they don’t care?

The answer is: WHO cares!? Who are they? How much time do they have to be worrying about you. More on “they” later ‘cuz that’s a whole ‘nother post, but perhaps they might be an imaginary audience you’ve created in your head…or haters with way too much time on their hands.

Either way, they are not relevant to you. They are not your supporters. And therefore ain’t nobody got time for they.

So, back to purpose… after identifying that, it was simple. I want this. I need this. I finally told myself, Justine, it's OKAY to do this for you. It's okay to fulfill your want for a creative outlet and a place to express yourself. That, my friend, is valid enough. I strive on conversation and community and believe we can all benefit from that.

I truly believe that visions and ideas are gifts from God that cannot manifest without action, and while 100% of the time we can't see the end, or where it will go, simply starting is all that we need. Sometimes the rest is not for us to figure out, but to unveil itself in due time.

Can I be honest? I have no idea where this thing could go. The fine-tuning is a work in progress. Will my mom be the only person reading it? It's a possibility. What I do know is that should something grow from this little page, my hope is that it's encouraging, inspiring, authentic, supportive, open-minded and of course, enjoyable!

The important part to me right now though is that I’m here. Finished (or in this case, started) is better than perfect.

*No pressure, but if ya love the kid and know what’s right in your heart, you’ll subscribe below. No but for real, leave those emails!*